Monday, April 23, 2012

Not Ashamed


You know what? I don't care what people think about me. If you want to judge me, that means you are too lazy to actually get to know me.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Sunday Post #9


Yesterday, I learned a very important lesson.

Several, actually.

Back story: have you ever had a question about something, and prayed and prayed to know the answer, and while waiting for that answer, you just accept what you think the answer to your question is on faith?

I'm gonna give you the condensed version of what happened. The full, 5 page story is currently sitting in my journal, where you will never, ever read it. Actually, when I write in my journal, I just like to ramble. So whatever is written in there isn't much different than what I'm about to tell you.


I've had a question about like that. I have, for the past several months, been accepting something on complete faith. Something I know next to nothing about:

Missionary Work.

I'm not going to go into much detail about why, other than that I can basically count on one hand how many farewells I've been to, and how many people I know well who are currently serving. I have only ever watched two guys open their mission calls, and it was at the same time. I have only received one letter from a missionary. None of my siblings have served a mission, yet. My most memorable experience with the missionaries was when I drove past the MTC wearing a heinous wig and about 20 of them walked past and laughed at me. I don't blame them. But essentially, it's just an area I know nothing about.

I'm not saying I've been thinking that missionary work is bad. It's just something I don't know a whole lot about, but have been accepting, on faith, the importance of it.

I didn't know why it was important, I had just been accepting, on faith, that it was.

But, remember the whole "witness comes after the trial of your faith?"

Sometimes, the trial of your faith takes a long time. But the Lord really does have a time and a place for everything. And my prayers were eventually answered.

I was working at Spicy Thai (my last day there, thank heavens), when two missionaries walked in. So I walked over and greeted then and sat them down at a table, and went to get their waters. When I came back, they started talking to me, asking where I was from, how long I had been working there, etc. They were the only people who I ever served who asked what my name was, and asked about, well, me. So we had a pretty good conversation, and I learned that the senior companion was from England (not gonna lie, he had a pretty awesome accent), and the other was from Minnesota.

I left to go seat another customer, but the minute I sat down again to start folding napkins I realized that the Spirit was like, overwhelmingly strong, for a reason I can't possibly explain. I was experiencing some major spiritual heartburn, which actually doesn't happen to me all that often. At that point, the voice in my head said, simply, "Those missionaries will answer any question you have." And I realized that this just might be the answer to my prayers.

At that point, it got busy, so I didn't get much of a chance to talk to them. But I racked my brain through every single question I had about missionary work and narrowed it down to one, which I asked while I was ringing them up: Why? Why did you choose to serve a mission? Why is it so important?

The British elder explained to me that there are people in the world who don't know who they are, or why they are here, and they (the missionaries) are sent to them to help them, essentially. He told me he chose to serve a mission because he knew the Lord expected him to, and he wanted to as well.

This part is about to get pretty confusing, so hold onto your hats, and I'll try to keep this in English.

It wasn't him answering my question that answered my question. It was the fact that they not only willingly answered my questions, but were eager to answer them. Largely, it was their example. They wanted to know who I was. They wanted to know about my life. They were easily the nicest people I ever served. And they had nothing on them except their wallets and a Book of Mormon.

Essentially, they were perfect examples of what the Lord's servants would look like.

So it hit me, that's what a mission is. Being the Lord's servant 24/7 for two years, where literally your main purpose is to serve others and bring them the gospel. For two years, you are sent into people's lives to change them. You get to be the answer to other people's prayers, daily. Knowing you are the answer to somebody's prayer is one of the greatest feelings in the world. So to be the answer to people's prayers, daily? Wow. That is pretty cool.

So I finally understand. I understand that the Lord will always answer your prayers, even if it does take months and months of faith and lots and lots of praying. He will answer your prayers when they are meant to be answered. No sooner, no later. I understand why people serve missions, and why they are so blessed for doing so. I finally understand why they are called the Lord's servants. They literally are. I had been praying for months, and he literally sent two of his servants into a restaurant simply to answer my prayers, and then leave to go change somebody else's life. That is what they do. They go where the Lord wants them to go.

I know running into the missionaries at work really isn't that big of an event, but I still feel so amazed that it happened. It's basically just a witness to me that Heavenly Father really does hear my prayers, and a witness that missionary work is basically the coolest thing ever.

You guys, the church is true. Seriously. And I know that I mess up, a lot, enough to come off as somebody who seems like she doesn't really care about the church, but I promise, those days are over.

Prayer is real, faith is real, the church is true. I promise. You guys are great. Thanks for reading the awkward novels I churn out every Sunday.

Have a great day!


One Year Older and Wiser Too


Well, one year ago was Prom. Still one of the best days of my life, hands down.

I tend to think of that day as a turning point in my life. The day my life officially changed, if you will. Because, well, it was. My life was extremely different after Prom.

I was thinking about it this weekend, and found myself asking, "is it weird that I still remember Prom, vividly, and think about it and still refer to it as the best day of my life, even though it was now one year ago?" From what I've been able to tell, most of my other friends...don't. It was just a fun date, and that's that.

Is it ridiculous that, after all this time, if I could relive one day in my life, it would be Prom? Yeah, it's pretty ridiculous. But here's how I justify that.

As I look back on the past year, Prom really was the last day of my official fun carefree childhood. After Prom, life wasn't simple and easy like it had been before. My life took a turn down a very bumpy, rocky road, and it has been ever since. Not that life hasn't been fun, because it has. But I've felt more like an adult than ever before. I've had to make some pretty grown up decisions. Like going to college. That was kind of a pretty grown up thing, right?

I've also had to deal with some pretty hard things. While life before Prom wasn't perfect, it certainly was a breeze compared to how my life is now.

So now the question is, would I consider that my life has improved since Prom?

Remember good, better and best?

Before Prom, my life was good. My life was very good. But all of the trials I went through after Prom were basically a refiner's fire. So my life is certainly much more difficult than it was before Prom, but the lessons I've learned since then have, I think, I hope...made me into a better person.

My heart is kind of breaking a little bit now as I'm writing this, so if this starts to not make any can just stop reading. I won't be offended. I won't even know!

Often, I have looked back on that previous life and wish for that carefree, easy bliss more than anything.

But life isn't supposed to be easy. And I wouldn't trade the lessons I've learned for anything in the world.

And let's be honest, I'm going to move out and be at BYU in a few months, so there's no way that my life is going to get easier. But the lessons I've learned in the past year are going to help me endure that trial. (Not that I think I'm going to hate living in the dorms and going to BYU. I'm actually completely stoked). And then the lessons I learn from living at BYU are going to help me in the next series of trials I endure. Ever since Prom it's like an explosion of learning has happened in my life. I don't know how to explain it, so here is a picture. I hope Sweetwood appreciates this beautifully crafted graph.

I'm not saying that Prom was where I learned a lot of great life lessons, it was basically just what happened at Prom that led to different things happening that caused me to learn lots of life lessons...yeah. The only lessons I learned at Prom were...never mind.

The point is, life hasn't been easy, but every trial, every heartbreak, every dumb thing that has happened has helped me grow significantly.

So Prom, here's to you. Thanks for a great day, and for quite an eventful year.

No regrets!


Lessons I Learned From The Shortest Job I Ever Had


A while back, I wrote a blog post venting about how angry I was working at Seven Peaks.

I take it all back. Literally, I took it in I deleted the post.

As many, if not all of you are well aware, I have a bad habit of making stupid decisions when I am upset. And guess what? Looking at how much tuition costs at the same time as you find out you didn't get a job promotion that would pay you basically enough to pay for said tuition is likely to make you upset. So that was bad decision number one. Bad decision number two was me deciding that I immediately needed to get another job.

This is about to get kind of religious, so hold onto your hats.

I've never really been the best at knowing when the Spirit is trying to tell me something. Buuuuuuut I've begun to figure out that when I have a really sick feeling and the voice in my head keeps saying "Kaela, don't do this. Kaela, bad idea. No, Kaela, stop. Bad...bad idea. Stop that. Stop that right now. Kaela, is this really the best idea? No, of course it isn't. No good. No bueno. Stop, stop, stop." then I'm not about to make a very smart decision.

So that much, I do know. And when I got that feeling as I applied for this job at Spicy Thai, and when I got the phone call for the job, and when I came in for an interview, and even when I was praying about whether or not I should take the job, I cannot FATHOM why I ignored that feeling, every single time. Okay, I do. I thought that I could handle it, I thought I needed the money, whatever.

The moral of this story is, if the Spirit is telling you not to do something, don't do it.

It will prevent a lot of problems. Trust me.

Luckily, quitting wasn't as painful as I thought it would be...but I would rather have avoided that situation all together.

At least I learned a lesson!

But seriously...when you have a bad feeling about's there for a reason.

Friday, April 20, 2012

Strange Stories in the Life of Kaela Part...what is this, 50 million?


First of all, I would like to start off by saying I have come up with a genius way to ensure that my children are not crazy drivers. I'm gonna be a freakin awesome parent.

I came up with this idea today when I was driving with an open container of food in the seat next to me. I was careful to not drive like a maniac, not slam on my breaks, and basically follow all of the traffic laws that I usually don't.

That's when I realized: if I were to teach my children how to drive, with an open container of food (for example, their lunch) sitting out, say on the dash, or the backseat, or something...then they would drive carefully so as not to spill their food. (Having it on the dash is even more effective because then they don't want to spill it on themselves.) This way, when it comes time to get their license, they will have become conditioned to driving carefully, and I don't have to worry about any crashes or tickets or what not.

I know, I'm kind of brilliant. Feel free to steal this idea. I would love nothing more than to keep the roads safe with my brilliant idea.

Have a great day!

Thursday, April 19, 2012

UV You Need to Know

I think my iPod is so old, that my mind and its microchip have melded. It has a knack for playing exactly the type of music that matches my mood.

For instance, I'm listening to a playlist with over a hundred songs, maybe 6 or 7 of which are Coldplay, and the rest range from Justin Bieber to B.O.B. is only playing Coldplay. Thanks, buddy.

So why am I in a Coldplay mood? Today is my last day of UVU. The first, one could say, of my goodbyes. I have absolutely loved going here. My professors are amazing. The experience has been phenomenal. Right now, I'm sitting on a very comfy cushion next to a window, blogging to my heart's delight, and a couple girls came up to me with a box of cookies and asked if I wanted one.

As long as I'm talking about food, let me just say that the massive amounts of food available here has been one of my top three sources of nourishment over the last semester. (ANOTHER Coldplay song just came on!! I don't know what's happening!!) I can be walking down the hall, and I'll see a vending machine, and think to myself, "I'll just use the next one" which is probably 20 feet down the hall. Once, I almost bought a drink, and then decided to use the next vending machine, and the next one was like a dollar cheaper. Yeah. And the Pizza Hut here is heavenly. And the cinnamon bagels....oh world...

The fact that I skipped my government class three times in a row and my teacher didn't freak out, the school didn't call my parents, and I did not receive a NG or a TR or whatever they give out feels good.

I love my English class. So much. As I was finishing up my paper and putting together my portfolio last night, I almost started crying because of how much I'm going to miss it. It is the only class I've ever had where the students, collectively, have more power than the teacher. It is also the only class I've ever had where the teacher swears like a sailor and tells dirty jokes. And yes, pornography is still an inside joke for our class. Last time, we had a quiz show. My group ended up crushing all of the other teams, but the competition got pretty intense. Like, it's just a semester long English 2010 class, but I'm going to miss it a LOT. Ah! :(

And the library. I love the library. I'm going to have a lot of fond memories of the library. The ULTRA comfy chairs, hanging out with Matt, and the food....the food!

This blog post is not about food. Okay.

Don't get me wrong. I am WAY excited for BYU. I am so excited to move out, meet new people, and have another great college experience. But UVU has been a lot of fun. And I wouldn't trade the experience I had here for anything that could have happened at Timpview.

So this is my tribute to UVU. For anybody reading this who is considering going to UVU next year, trust me -- it is an AWESOME school. Lots of people think its just a ghetto college for BYU rejects, but that's not at all what it is. It is fun, the teachers are great, and it's pretty daaaaang easy (just sayin).

UVU, thanks for a great semester, and a fantastic first college experience! I come!


Sunday, April 8, 2012

Sunday Post #8


So last week...I just sat home and watched like...8 hours of TV. And I didn't go to church.

Just like everyone else!!

Okay, that was a bad joke. But wasn't conference great? It's like every six months, we just get this huge refresher of new wisdom and council from our leaders. It is seriously one of the best things ever.

Last conference, I was watching one of the sessions at work when my co-worker told me how one of her friends or something had been talking about how if you watch one talk a week after conference, you'll have re-watched all of the sessions by the time the next conference rolls around. I thought that was so cool! But then I forgot.

I've decided to do it this time around though. I don't think you can get everything out of a talk by just listening to it once. It's like reading the scriptures: every time I read the Book of Mormon, I learn something new. There are a lot of different principles we can learn from all of the different conference talks, and I think they are just as important to study as the scriptures.

So with that in mind, I'm taking the challenge! I'm going to try to re-watch all of conference by October. Wow, that's scary to think. The next time I watch conference, it will not be in my own home. It'll be in Helaman Halls. Ah!

Looks like I'm gonna need all the help I can get!


Saturday, April 7, 2012

Just Take the Time to Stop, Think.


Today was one of those thinking days.

This is going to be the first of many "everyone is leaving!" blogs, so brace yourself.

Today started out with a decision to make unleavened bread for Easter/my mom's birthday. So it actually wasn't very unleavened. It was just banana...Reese's Peanut Butter Cup...bread. And I actually haven't tried it yet, but I hope it is as delicious as it sounds.

Then I cleaned my house...and my room. My room was a complete disaster. So I started out by picking up my shoes. After room was pretty much clean. I have a lot of shoes.

In my now clean room, I tried to practice breakdancing. I am pretty sure that resulted in two pulled muscles, because I am in severe amounts of pain. 8 hours later.

Then I took a nap. I dreamed that I was lying in bed awake. It was surreal.

Then I tried to work on homework, but let's be honest, I can only take working on my porn research paper in half an hour increments before I go absolutely insane.

And then I went to the international cinema with Yon Soo to watch "My Name Is Khan." I'll admit I went in pretty skeptical, because some foreign movies I've watched have either been really good (Town Called Panic, Hadippa!) or completely weird (Russian Ark...still haunts me).

This is one of the best movies I've ever seen. It made me tear up more than any movie I've ever watched, and I rarely get choked up during movies.

It was the story of a Muslim man with Asperger's syndrome and how his life was changed after 9/11 and his journey to tell the president, "My name is Khan, and I am not a terrorist."

A short plot summary doesn't explain what the movie was really about though. It was a very, very powerful story about love. Not a love story, a story about love. Love bringing people together. Love helping people overcome pain and anger. Love being the real solution.

It was amazing. And it got me in a really somber mood, which is why today was a thinking day.

I came to several realizations about life.

First, God is smart. For the past...ever...I've been praying for two things that, unknown to me, were contradicting each other. The first one was getting into Heritage Halls. Stupid, I know. And I'll admit, I was so angry with Him for not giving me that. Didn't He know how much I wanted it?

Yeah, He did. But He also knew how much I wanted this other thing. That ultimately, I wanted that more than anything else in the world. And, the other thing would be a lot better blessing than living in Heritage Halls.

I know that didn't make any sense. But the point is, my prayers were answered, just not in the way I expected, but still in a better way I ever could have hoped for.

Second, I've been really selfish. I've literally been sitting around only thinking about myself. "I'm going to be so miserable." "Nothing ever goes right in my life."

Yeah, a lot of things are going to happen soon that are going to make me pretty darn sad. Will I cry at graduation? You bet I will. Will I burst into tears during the AP Stats test? I'd say there's a pretty good chance, especially if there is a free response about Type II errors.

I've been pretty worried about May. The people I've grown closest to this year are going to be leaving for a new part of their own lives, and I've been sitting around thinking about how miserable that's going to make me.

And then I realized a couple things. I'm not the only one who is going to go through that. I'm not saying it won't be hard, but I've really been sitting here thinking that I'm the only one who is going to go through that. Which is just plain selfish. This is freaking graduation. Everybody is going to be going through that.

The other thing I realized is that I've been dwelling too much on people leaving instead of enjoying what time we have left. I've been unhappy basically all of the time because I've had exactly the wrong mindset through all of this.

And one more thing: people that I love are going to leave. But, people that I will come to love will be coming into my life, too! I'm going to meet so many people, especially living in Helaman Halls! I can't even express how excited I am for that. It is going to be such a blast.

This is life. Life is full of changes. Some are a lot bigger than others, but learning how to cope with them is just another part of the experience. College, moving out, really will be a new chapter in my life. And I'm going to make it a fantastic one.


Friday, April 6, 2012

News That Makes Your Heart Stop


I'm sure that anybody reading this is very well aware of my intense love of the tabernacle, soon to be the newest Provo temple. So I'm really not going to go into detail.

I want to get married there. There is no other temple I would get married in. So future husband, plan accordingly.

This is also known as my "Temple Insurance" plan, making it so I cannot get married until that temple is finished, by or before 2015.

Why Kaela, how did you know that?

Read that, and then understand something. When I saw this article, my heart literally stopped. And I thought, I have to go to that. I must go to that.

You guys, I can't even express how much I cannot wait for that temple to be finished. I absolutely cannot wait to see how absolutely gorgeous the inside will be. I cannot wait to get married inside that temple.

May 12th, 2012. I have to be there.