Sunday, March 20, 2011

We We We So Excited.

Watch this.

If you didn't watch the whole thing, which I understand, go back and watch it again.

Are we all set? Are you sufficiently scarred?


I've been blogging about so many lame things lately, I decided to shake things up. Because the fact is, I have a lot of things to say about Rebecca Black.

Lately I've become somewhat addicted to Twitter. Not so much for tweeting everything I say and do, but more for staying informed, and the occasional hopeless "Please follow me!" to @justinbieber. I've also asked him to take me to prom this way several times too. He will reply.

Anyways, Rebecca Black has been a trending topic on Twitter for the past 2 weeks. She has lasted longer than Japan AND Charlie Sheen! But why?

The truth is, the music industry has been throwing out more and more garbage over the years. But as you just saw, Rebecca Black's new song Friday EASILY takes the cake. So this is what I thought of the video.

It starts out looking like one of those tacky shows about middle know the ones we all watched in 6th grade and thought they were SO cool? Another note. As far as I have been informed, Ark Music Factory is a place that gets a bunch of pre tweens who want the fame and fortune that comes with being an overrated pop star, they crank out a cheesy music video, and then upload it to YouTube hoping for overnight success. They finally scored with Rebecca Black, not because she was talented, but because she was so frikin horrible!

I'll just continue...she starts singing a few "oh ohs" and a few "yeah yeahs" and you wonder "oh my heck, who just broke the autotune machine?" (according to her twitter, no autotune was involved in the making of this video. It is all her own voice. Scary, huh?) And then she starts singing actual words. Mostly she is naming off things she's 'gotta' have...a bowl, cereal, lookin fresh, and then she runs out to the bus stop.

This is one of the parts that most of the media has a lot to say about. She sees her 11 year old friends, all driving a convertable for some odd reason. I think it goes without saying that her friends are clearly too young to be driving. And she sings about making her mind up - should she go with her friends, or take the bus? How hard of a decision is that? Really? They are driving a convertable! What do you think you should do!

All this song really showed me was that Rebecca Black is the most undecisive person on the planet. She also sings about sittin in the front seat, and kickin in the back seat. Which seat should she take?? Well, since there are already two people sitting in the front, and it's a convertable, that really only leaves the back seat open...right?

This is why 11 year olds shouldn't drive. Clearly, they can't even count.


Oh, my gosh. I now know what song I'll have stuck in my head for the next few Fridays. Also, she looks like she is in pain everytime she says weekend. Juss sayin.


The next scene shows her, at night, standing up in the back seat of the convertable, talking about driving on the highway.


Girl! If you are driving on the highway in a convertable, you don't want to be standing up! You don't even need to be passing physics to know that! Then she starts singing "I got this you got this" Got what? "You know what it is!" No, I don't. And clearly, neither do you. She then explains to us that her friend is by her right. Oh, I didn't know that. I was really wondering who that random 11 year old is. Now I'm REALLY curious about who the random 11 year old on her LEFT is. But mostly I'm curious about why they are 11 and dressed like sluts.

Honestly, a lot of the lyrics she says in this part don't make any sense. It's mostly yelling a lot of random words, which left me pretty confused. I got what? I know what what is? Why are you standing up in the back of a moving convertable? Being driven by someone 5 years too young to have a license? Then she tells us that she is sittin in the back seat. No! No! You aren't! And again, she asks us which seat she should take. Aren't you already in the back seat? I'm confused.

Then her and her friends show up at some party packed with more fancy cars and more slutty 11 year olds. What is going on here?!

Except this part is possibly the best part of the entire video. Here, she educates us on the days of the week. She fails to realize that we, unlike her, learned the days of the week soon after we were born. So she explains to us that yesterday was Thursday, and that today is Friday (which I'm sure nobody had picked up from the rest of the video until now). She also tells us that "we we we so excited." Which probably made every grammar nazi scream with rage. Then she tells us that tomorrow is Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards. Thanks for clearing that up...I really had no idea.

Next, this random black guy starts rapping. This reminded me of Justin Bieber, how he always has some famous black man rap for his songs. Except for one minor difference. Justin Bieber has Ludacris, Usher, and Sean Kingston. Rebecca Black has her dad. (I kid you not, she confirmed it on Twitter.)

The next part is mostly her alternating from standing by a tree and singing for her friends, and standing in a strangely lit room doing what sounds like an attempt at singing, but mostly sounds like her voice is cracking while she is being stabbed. She sings the chorus about 7 times, so with a song that already emphasises repetition, it's like a double dose of WHEN WILL THIS BE OVER.

And then finally, it ends.

Overall, the video mostly scared me into thinking "what is really happening to the music industry? They can't honestly call this talent." It also looked like the entire video had been picnik-ed.

Mostly, I really hope this is one of those YouTube videos that people laugh at for a while, and gets really popular and everybody knows about it, but then within a few weeks it blows over and everybody forgets about it. Kind of like the Numa Numa guy. Remember him?

Many people are calling her the next Justin Bieber, to which I reply: Good heavens, no. I really hope she never gets as famous as him. If people think he is bad, Rebecca Black would be the death of our already crippled music industry.

Aaaaand yeah. That's all I really have to say about that.



Carrots said...

This made me laugh SO HARD. Thank you for brightening my day. :)

Lucky Sevens said...

K! You have a talent for words and words that speak SO much truth. Every person outside of my apartment heard me laughing! Your wit and humor are a gift. Love the blog.