This was probably the worst Christmas I have ever experienced. I know that complaining about Christmas is about the worst thing a person can do besides suffocating a puppy in a plastic bag, but really...it was a nightmare. You always see movies where a Christmas is going really badly but then somehow in the end everything gets better...and because Santa is real and the sprit and magic of Christmas is somehow very real, it did end up that way, eventually. But seriously, 99% of my day was pretty darn bad. I won't go into detail, but think extreme nausea, angry family members, and intense emotional trauma...and that isn't even half of it. By 11:30 in the morning I was laying in my bed bawling my eyes out and wishing I was dead.
Today wasn't all bad though. Church was actually really, really good. (Except during the sacrament when I felt like every force of nature was trying to make me vomit. That would have been extremely bad.) But, at the very end of the meeting the combined wards suddenly had a surprise choir and about a third of the people got up and sang and it sounded really amazing and the spirit was really strong and afterwards we were standing around saying "Merry Christmas" to each other and I was just like "Yeah this is great I love Christmas!"
After that, it was one train wreck after another. And I was sitting in here blogging about how the Grinch had nothing on how horrible my Christmas was when Santa showed up to explain a few things to me. Santa is real, and he is magical, and I can't explain it, but there really isn't any other explanation for it.
Basically, my day was rotten. But Christmas was not. I had been so absorbed in all the terrible things that were happening that I forgot to be happy about the real reason we even have Christmas.
Christmas is my favorite holiday. I have officially decided that. Because it's Christmas that we get to spend time with our families, where we are encouraged to show love and service and most importantly remember Christ's birth. What a wonderful blessing! This Christmas, I didn't care about presents, all I wanted was to be able to bond with my family and friends. And when I didn't seem to get that, I was totally bummed. But I wasn't looking hard enough.
First of all, Yon Soo Park is one of the best friends I've ever had. If anyone was there for me today, it was her. No matter how irrational I was being, she tried to cheer me up. I kind of feel like Santa just stuffed her in my stocking this year, only that didn't really happen. Also, that's kind of weird. Yon Soo, if you're reading this...don't think I'm creepy. I'm really just saying thanks.
Second of all, I did get to spend time with my family. Even though some weird stuff definitely went down, I still had the opportunity to see my family that I don't get to see very often and spend the holiday with them.
So maybe I did feel angry and sad and my family was being angry and weird and I felt like I was going to throw up all day. But in the end, I did get what I wanted for Christmas: just more time with my family and friends.
Just like in the Grinch, through having the crummiest Christmas of all time, it helped me realize what the true meaning of Christmas really is: VENGEANCE!
Just kidding. It's love, remembering Christ's birth and giving thanks! And I couldn't be more thankful for this totally crummy Christmas I experienced.